Our Dad's Battle Against Cancer

OUR DAD

“A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to preserve and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.” – Christopher Reeve

 

Our dad, our hero, our best friend.  The person who has taught us to stand up for what we believe in.  The person who comes running when we call.  The person who always has our back.  The person whose heart continues to burst with love, compassion and generosity, even in the toughest of times.  Our dad is truly one of a kind.  He is our biggest supporter, our most trusted confidant, our shoulder to cry on.  His openness has allowed us to find ourselves with the courage that he’ll be there to catch us if we ever fall.  His positive attitude and smile attract everyone.  Humble, dedicated, and persistent… he worked tirelessly to provide all 5 of us with wonderful lives.  Lives that we are so grateful to live alongside him. 

 

Cancer has taken a lot from our dad, but it hasn’t taken away his fight, his strength, or his determination.  We can only hope that we are half the strong, persistent, beautiful, loving, undefeatable person that he is.  Our dad, our hero, our best friend.  We admire you. 

 

HIS JOURNEY

“And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive.  You won’t even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over.” – Haruki Murakami

 

In June of 2015, our dad was diagnosed with soft tissue sarcoma cancer.  We gathered as a family, devastated, heartbroken, confused, and scared we were going to lose him.  Within 10 days, he was scheduled to undergo an intensive 10-hour surgery.  He successfully came out of surgery with no stomach, left adrenal gland, spleen, and missing part of his pancreas.  If the cancer touched it and the surgeon could remove it, it was gone.  I know what you’re thinking; you can’t live a “natural” life without a stomach!  The journey ahead would be unimaginable and to most, probably unbearable. 

 

Dad lost 60 pounds post-operation.  He was hooked-up to a feeding tube for 4 months and worked hard to get enough nutrients.  Each day was a struggle.  His goal was to work toward settling into a “new normal” and allowing his body to heal and adjust to the loss of his stomach and other major missing organs over time. 

 

Starting to eat and drink again was very difficult and required a determined amount of effort.  It took a lot of energy to properly consume enough calories to get through the day and maintain a healthy weight.  It required tremendous strategizing and effort and was much more than simply worrying about putting food into his body.  He had to pace himself.  Foods he once was able to inhale, he could no longer handle.  He constantly reminded himself that if he ate too fast, too much, or too big of bites, then “dumping syndrome” would occur.  Symptoms he experienced ranged from nausea, vomiting, cramps, abdominal pain, and feeling full after eating only a small amount of food.  Since keeping weight on was (and still is) so significant, his life seemed to revolve around when, where, how, and what to eat or drink on an hourly basis.

 

6 months later the cancer returned. December of 2015 was the start of 4 months of extreme chemotherapy treatment.  He was admitted to the hospital each month to complete his rounds. Dad’s new “normal” was 5 days per month in the hospital for chemo treatments.  We remember visiting him, watching nurses come in with gloves, hairnets, facemasks … you name it … when they were switching out the chemo bags.  We looked at each other in awe thinking “this is what is going in dad’s body?”  Days and nights in the hospital began to blur together.  Dad was weak.  He didn’t have the stamina to get through an entire day.  The surgery, the weight-loss, the cancer, and the chemotherapy began to really take a toll on his body. 

 

In June 2016, Dad got scheduled for his second major surgery to remove 3 more small cancer masses in the abdominal area.  This time, he would have to suffer through 25 continuous days of radiation.  He was sick all the time, but he made it.

 

By December 2016, he once again was very, very ill.  After 25 days grueling days, the doctor finally found what was causing the illness – his intestines had collapsed due to the radiation.  Dad had more surgery to repair the intestines in January of 2017.  Once again, he was back on the road to recovery.

 

Months passed.  Dad attempted to return to work; even if it was on a part-time basis.  He wanted his old normal.  Unfortunately, it was never normal.  It was extremely challenging, both physically and emotionally, to complete simple tasks he once was able to do.  He was not the same.  

 

December 27, 2018, a “routine” biopsy almost cost our dad his life.  An artery was cut on the operating table and lifesaving measures were put into place.  Recovery seemed near-impossible, to us, at least.  But, by the grace of God, he did in fact make a full recovery.  One that had us all believing this was finally the end to this nightmare. 

 

Recently, everything seemed to be coming together again.  Weekends were spent without naps, tube-changing appointments, or stomachaches, but instead on the couch watching football surrounded by loved ones or outside watching grand kids run, scream, laugh, and play.  He had enough energy to manage the house, lawn, and even watch his grandchildren without help … you try watching a 3-year-old. 😉 We were extra hopeful that our lives were returning to “normal” (although, is there a normal after cancer?) 

 

Finally feeling strong enough to begin looking for a full-time job, the news that his cancer is back would once again engulf our lives.  Why?  How?  The devastation of hearing the words “I have cancer” seems to get more difficult.  Although heartbroken, positivity radiated from his body.  “Science has come a long way in 3 years.  It will be better than last time” he said as we cried.  His focus is not on the 3 months of chemotherapy or another surgery that is yet to come in Spring of 2020, it is hopefulness of what he has and what he will overcome.  

 

Although these past 4 years have meshed into a heartbreaking blur and have been distressing – to say the least – our dad has shown us to always find the good in any terrible situation. 

 

IT’S OKAY TO NOT BE OKAY

“I always thought to save for a rainy day but when is it going to STOP raining?” - Dad

 

Although he raised us to be strong and independent, he also raised us to know when to ask for help.  The road to recovery is hard; especially since new obstacles keep arising.  He’s given all he has to make sure we are all happy and thriving.  He’s never once asked for anything in return.  We are happy and we are thriving, and we credit him for that.  Now it’s our turn to ask.

 

Dad was laid off at his job 3 months prior to being diagnosed with cancer.  With the loss of job came loss of insurance.  With the cancer came multiple surgeries, in-home nurse visits, physical therapy, ER visits, chemo and radiation therapy sessions +++ came a loss of financial stability.   Dad learned a week ago, the cancer is back.

 

We’ve had many people ask how they can help.  Up until this point, all Dad has asked for is positive energy and prayers.  With the return of cancer, he’s facing another round of chemo, radiation, surgery, and all that goes with it. 

 

Please join our family and support our dad through a contribution, big or small, and messages of encouragement to help him as he once again fights the battle.

 

Thank you for rallying behind our Dad, Jeff Kapp. Your support continues to carry him through this difficult time.  Words cannot begin to describe our appreciation.  We are truly forever grateful.  #KappStrong